Will You Still Love Me

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Greetings Beloved,

No, we are not “on holiday”, but have had a rough couple days again between, forced to shop for that thing called food, sick kittens – yes again… and the humanoid that is now officially “on holiday”.

I wait for some form of guidance as you know, most days, some days it doesn’t come so clearly, other days, smack bang in the head…

Some days we speak book, other days we chat as friends…

Let us chat as friends, while I try and get Onyx off the pc… Heavens…

You all know I have a humanoid in the house, yes that little “thingy” that leaves footprints like a person… *giggles* The “wisdom” came from her comment. And yes, we have spoken about this many times over.

I don’t enjoy any form of body shaming, I do have a stand on, if you are unhappy with yourself, do something about it, don’t cry being over weight when you eat a tub of ice-cream, a bag of chips, and a slab of chocolate at 12 at night, thinking if no one sees, then it is not real…. Yeah, and you can stand and tell me, as I have been told – I “look” anorexic, believe me I eat, and eat junk too these days… but for some reason, I don’t “put on the weight”.

Why in the heavens am I talking about this?

There I am this morning, giving the little human a hug and a cuddle, and telling her, I love her, no matter her not listening, or being slightly rebellious, or doing naughty stuff… I still love her…

And the question comes again…. Mommy, will you still love me even if I am fat?

Now, I have dealt with this nonsense for a year now, children teasing her, calling her a giant, and fat, and too big… and yes, she is a big girl. At age 6 and 5 months, she stands 1.23cm. Weighs in at 38kg. And dresses in 12/13 years clothing.

Do I stress about it, I do, but not in the way that you may think – I stress that food becomes her enemy, I stress that she will try to “fit” in while starving her body at some point to be with the “IT” girls. I stress that she will believe that she needs to “look” a certain way, behave a certain way, just to fit in…

I lifted myself up, and said to her, for the umpteen time, you are not fat. “I said, if I am fat mommy, if I am fat, will you still love me”

I will love you fat or thin, short or tall, clever, or challenged, I will love you no matter what. As “growler” (her cat) was on the bed too, I asked her to look as Artimes, “Do you see how big she is lovie?”

Yes, mommy…

Do you love her any less because she is big?

No mommy, I love her, she is just a big girl…

There you go, you love her, no matter what she looks like… same applies with me. I love you the same, the only “thing” I must ensure, is that you eat food, healthy food, before any sweet stuff…

This applies in life, we only love some parts of people, we judge them from the outside, we don’t see the inside, we don’t take the time to see who they are…

I think our lesson is, to love without restrictions, or demands, or boxed in needs… Just to love.

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