My Story

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Within each of us lies a thousand stories.

You think this is a repeat don’t you. *smiles*.  Many people “think” that I don’t hear them, they speak and must wonder why my eyes are focused on the horizon, and maybe not facing them, or think that I am not interested in what they are saying – sometimes I simply “space” out.

I have found in this wonderous retrograde, as the one before, that it called for silence. I think it has a lot to do with my internal journey now. We speak about our souls being tired, and the need for silence. The need for rejuvenation, for “waking up and living”. For rest.

But rest and silence, rejuvenation and so forth, is different for each of. Some of us can have a cat nap, feel much better, or wake up after the hour not knowing what century we are in. (Like me)

We scream for silence in a world with constant noise pollution, yes, you read that correct, not only does our beautiful planet suffer all sorts of pollution, we suffer from self-inflicted noise pollution.

Brings me to the “story” within us. Our heads are BUSY 24/7, 356 ¼ ALL THE DAMN TIME, from waking to sleep, to waking again. The stories of who we are, where we have journeyed, what we have survived, thoughts of the future, prettily “ribboned”, or horridly scary.

Thoughts of betrayal, of love, of loss, of gain, of everything that has brought you to the place where you are sitting or standing reading this…

The story of you. Wow hey, imagine if you could enter all those hidden little places within you, some “forgotten” stories, maybe some pain, maybe some hurt, or maybe some happiness, that you have forgotten about… Imagine if you could place all that on paper. Your story. Where you have been, what you have done, what you have endured, and the brilliance of it all, what it shaped you to be today.

“We” say, one cannot “blame” another for the chosen path, or the parents for what they did, or the life you lived to now, and I agree, you cannot, all you can do is find the lesson. Why, what and how… why have you chosen this experience, what has it taught you, and how does it shape you… better or worse?

I hope better, and if not, remember that there is always a negative in every positive, and ALWAYS a positive in every negative…

This year has added rich stories within me. Some that are so painful, others that make me angry. Most that hands an opportunity to be better, be more, or less, more me, or less the conditioned version of that ridiculous thing called social expectation.

The need to “fit”, the need to “belong” the need to…. You fill the dots. Or do I stand back and flip through the hundreds of books within me and realise that it never was a need, but maybe a desperate want. I want to fit in, I want to belong… But in all honesty, and after many years of believing this is what I need, I know: I belong to myself, I fit within my own creation of life… and it may never be accept by the masses. But that is ok, because this is:

The story of ME.

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