Can You Hear Me

Good Morning Beautiful and brave path finders,

I do hope that your weekend has passed with love. As that is about all we need. Love in the simplest form.

It feels like I had a fight with myself last night, long night of wakefulness, a busy mind, and a body that needed sleep. Doesn’t happen often that I find myself awake, but I know the busy mind is for the week ahead. It may be that I will miss postings from Wednesday until the week after, but I will sure to let you all know in time.

However, before we run off to that, the week has just started with new adventures in tow.

Are you ready to put to the test this week around? I hope so, remember, you are brave!

I have not forgotten that we are on the journey of showing you the personality reporting – but today I would like us to hang that up, as I have something heavy on my heart.

How do you listen? Dear heavens we have spoken about the generosity of speaking and listening so much over the past months that I feel like I am on repeat this morning. But, this weekend I have experienced first hand once again, how people listen – or read – or interact with each other.

Yes, granted we all make mistakes and misread, as these days it is more texting that speaking (thank gods for voice notes). Perhaps we are not taught to listen to another person, and take in what they are saying. How have we become so self-centred? To the extend of invoking anger in each other because we do not hear. I understand so much better in later years the difference between hearing and listening. You think they are the same? And then, let us not forget the importance of coding our message for the other person to have the same message as what we intended. There is huge responsibility on each of to listen, read and ask if not understanding.

That last statement is another can of worms all together. We believe that if we ask a question for clarity it will be a level of stupidity. Who knows where that comes from, as I remember being taught that asking a question shows interest, and a mind filled with curiosity.  I am sure we all have our own personal reasoning.

Where did we go wrong? And is it wrong? In my world yes, I cannot lie about how I feel. When I say something, and I feel that the listener may not understand, I will clarify without them asking. Stating very clearly that I am not insulting their intelligence, but I need no room for interpretation.

Ever been faced with someone that does not hear you at all? Saying the same thing over and over, you respond, but it seems that nothing is sinking in? Here comes the psychology question, how does that make you feel?

Do you feel lesser a person, as your words are not considered important enough? Do you doubt that you have value to add? Do you wonder if the person that is talking to you are aware of what they are doing?

Let me give you an example:

“Good morning, so-and-so, did this-and that again.”

Response:

“Good morning, how are you, I sorry to hear that, I cannot talk right now I am busy with blah-fish-paste.”

“So, what can I do now, blah this and that, blah-blah-blah…”

“Like I said, I am just busy with this and that, I cannot talk right now, can you possibly hang on a bit, I am… wherever; doctor, dentist, funeral, home with my daughter….”

“so, I did, wharra-wharra, and then she/he did blah-blah….

And it continues.

Do you do this? And if you are, are you aware of it? Do you think it is important to have this checked? I think so. I have been trying to teach my husband to wait until another has stopped speaking before he says anything. I do the same at times, I am over-animated, and get excited over something I remember. Thus, I don’t get angry, however go silent, and he notices that he has interrupted. No one is perfect, we are perfect in our beautiful imperfections, but having noticed something that touches an irritation within me, I have also become aware of interrupting. And I apologise for it, or ask, whether I can interrupt quick to respond to something.

I have learned that when you speak over someone, you indirectly tell them, their voice does not matter. Or when you say you cannot speak at that given time, and have a valid reason – not that you need to justify yourself – and the other person is just carrying on as if you have said nothing – I seem to wonder back in time, where my voice really did not matter.

It is a horrid time to travel back to, and I cannot say I like the emotion it stirs up. In all the years of studying and bettering myself as an individual, I have gained many insights in the human behavioural patterns.

One thing that stands out so clearly, if you cannot respect my voice, an almost stranger that you are interacting with, what chance does the household have?  You do not listen; thus, you do not hear, thus you react towards something you think is happening, thus you have failed relationships. Any type of relationship.  Let that sink in slowly – and for today may I ask you, to take a breath, have a breather, and LISTEN, HEAR and FEEL the other person, before you react.